Joshua and I have been in Louisville for 2 months. And boy, what a two months it's been. I have learned so much already about marriage and myself.
I am surprising myself everyday at how well I am actually adjusting here in this new place 800 miles away from all familiarity. I keep thinking that maybe I'm still in denial and that any day now the sobs, tears, and all the snot that come with them will fall freely from my eyes and nose, but it hasn't happened yet.
I think I have actually surprised Joshua too. I'm sure he's happy that he hasn't come home to me crying while eating bon bons and skyping with my family.
It's been different "church shopping". I have never not been a part of a church. Even while in college, I found a church quickly and got involved. We have been searching since we got here and we think we have finally found one.
The churches here in Louisville are amazing, and we find ourselves having to base our decision on preference rather than hard doctrine. That's a weird feeling. I feel so picky and selfish for trying to base a decision so big on something as simple as worship style. But like I said, the churches here are amazing.
All that to say, we went to visit on church about a month ago. We loved the church and up until last week, it was in the running to be our home church here in Louisville. While sitting in the service God taught me something, not through the sermon, but through observation.
The church is right down the street from a School for the Blind; because of that, I began to notice that there were a lot of blind people in the congregation. There were enough that the church provided song sheets in brail and bulletins in brail.
While at the church, I wasn't expecting to be taught as much as I was; I didn't bring my journal like I usually do. I'm sure I looked like a crazy person because I wrote from cover to cover on my bulletin. I could've waited until I got home to write in my journal, but I couldn't hold it in; I had to write down what I was experiencing somewhere.
Here's what I wrote in my bulletin,
"I have been so blessed this morning by the blind man in the next pew. Even if Joshua and I don't end up here, I will cherish the way Christ spoke to me through this man who has no earthly sight. My first thought was pity. I felt pity for all that things he was missing. He can't see a rainbow, the trees, the grass, the color blue, or green, or the mountains, lakes or hills. As I kept watching, I began to feel jealous. I became jealous because even though he has no eartly sight, he probably has more heavenly sight than I will ever know this side of Heaven. Every word, phrase, or song he sings he gets to focus solely on Jesus because he isn't distracted by all of the earthly sights. He doesn't have to worry about the looks he may be getting for how loudly he's singing. He can't see all of the other distractions I see in times of worship. I wonder if God gives the blind sight of trees, grass, and colors in their purest form, as they were in the Garden of Eden. I wonder if he shows the blind more of his glory because he knows they won't miss it. As I watched him worship, following along with his fingers on the brail song sheet I realized he isn't the blind one, I am."
I have thought about this man several times in the last month and it leads me to worship. He will never know how much he blessed me.
